The Journey Begins

” I always thought that the journey of life would be easy”

This is my story….

Born into a world, we’re I was not wanted by mother… She was young and in a home…

I grew up in a house we’re violence and adultery seem to be the number one priority…me and my sister was under the impression that this is normal and is happening in any housed..

My dad which I always cherished was an alcoholic..but he always made me feel loved unlike my mother..

For some reason my mother felt I ruined her life for falling pregnant.. So I was always rejected, abandoned in so many ways..

During the period I never understood the domestic violence happening in our home until recently only in 2019..my age 38..

Adultery and child neglect was the main reasons according to my dad… Although this should never be a reason but I only understood now why all that happened..

I always used to protect the old lady getting in between getting some of the punishment, to my regret knowing what I know now I would have never done that…

At the age of 7 my dad gave us to my mother due to his alcoholic problem and we left with her, not that I ever wanted to go with…

I remember climbing into a big truck. Looking behind me and saw my helpless dad standing there, not wanting to go anywhere with her.. But yet he let us go..

I never new he made the decision to let us go with her, yet again 31 years later I was told the reason was because of his alcoholic problem..

There is reasons why after 31 years I only started asking questions.. This will be revealed later in my life story..

So continuing.. As we moved out from a violent and adultery home.. We moved into an abusive home..sexual abusive home.. Yet again my mother only thinking of her self…

After 31 years, I could never remember what happened between the ages of 8 to 11 in my life.. 3 years missing not remembering what happened until recently a month ago 2019 to be exact…

To be continued…

The Journey Begins part 2

I found out that we moved out of the home of violence into a house of sexual abuse. Me and my sibling were unaware of what’s coming our way..until the move happened.

Starting in a flat as I could remember where my lovable mother took us to move into with 2 unknown men, to me and my sibling we were very scared and uncertain of what is going to happen, what is lying ahead in this new environment..we settled in..

We missed our dad, no comfort from our mother, only her and her alone mattered at that time and always have been only her..

These men not knowing that one of them would be my brothers father one day..used to walk around us in there undies not fully clothed.. we did not understand this as we never had this in our home which we grew up in..as my dad would never walk around like that in front of us..

We used to complain and cried by my mother but yet nothing changed at any given time of day..

I remember 🙂 I use to phone my dad’s sister complaining to her that she must tell my dad to collect us..but all failed attempts..

Sad part is my mother never gave us my dad’s phone numbers, we never could call him personally.. 😦

During this time, many bad things happened to me, as i remember, but yet crying to my mother never seemed to help, as she never listened…

Ages 8-12 for me was hell, the stuff i went through..and i had no one to cry to no mother, no father, no friends… i had to go through this alone..

Not even when I tried to commit suciede at the age of 12 did my mother listen nor see whats happening, or busy happened to me..by that time my brother was born..

I had a new sibling to take care off, to protect from the bad people…

To be continued…

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton